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09:33pm 09/07/2012
Aaron Trumm
If I was William Wallace, I would have not shitted for like 2 days before they tortured me. And I'd have eaten the rottenest foulest crap I could find. Dirt and nails and rubber and such. Maybe they didn't have rubber back then but I bet I could find something else bouncy and unnatural. I would eat beer and brocolli and eggs. Maybe I wouldn't be able to get whatever I wanted to eat. Well I'd just eat their gruel but I'd eat a lot and I'd punch another guy and eat his and maybe even kill that guy and eat him. And stick leaves or mud up my butt or something to keep from pooping. 'Cause if they're gonna rip my guts out I want it to be a very unpleasant experience for them too. It can get all over them, the nasty greenish terrible goo. They can smell it and taste it even. And to boot, I bet that would make it a nice relief for me, even amongst all the pain.

Just sayin.
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